I didn't write anything last week...I did try ('try' is a word I usually detest, but is is relevant in this context).
The previous week, I had written about the importance of 'shining' and being hurt when feeling left out or unseen.
I could have easily followed this up last week by writing about how proud I was of Daniel shining by getting 3 unconditional offers for Universities...in fact, I did write that piece...twice...and deleted it again!
I deleted it because I felt I was being boastful - yes, of course I am so proud, but I was conscious that I was putting myself in a position where I was boasting about my son being picked for the team...which could have been less than helpful for those parents who are worried about their teenagers future plans and UCAS offers right now.
So even though I had a moment to shine as a very proud parent, I didn't, because I was mindful of others and how they might feel.
I didn't heed Marianne Williamson's wise words at all.
I have thought about this a lot over the last week and what could I have done differently? How could I have shone a light on my happiness and on Daniel's success without feeling boastful and insensitive to others?
I'm not sure I know the answers, but I do know it is important to acknowledge the amazing achievement of Daniel...so I'm doing it now, a week later, in a more muted, calm way!
Where is the balance, I wonder, between shining so brightly that nobody else's light is seen...and not shining at all? Does this shining light have an on/off switch or is there a dimmer switch? Where is the constant, reassuring, gentle glow to be found...somewhere in the middle, I'll bet, with an occasional flash of bright light and short periods of darkness too!
...And that is OK.
Wishing you a festive season full of warm glow, bright lights and breathing space...and I look forward to continuing the journey with you next year xx